Why do we feel ashamed of unwaxed arms and legs?

Harnaam Kaur embraces her facial hair and works against bullying.

“Oh no, I have a moustache!”

I need to wax before I can wear this dress!

I have so much hair in my, *down there.*

While we always want longer, thicker mane, even a single body hair repels us. We will run to shave it, epilate it, veet-it and what not (if the waxing cycle is far).

We spend a significant amount of time and money worrying and getting rid of our body hair. And pubic hair is of course an entirely different matter altogether.

While facial hair for men is THE symbol of masculinity, it is the same for woman. A single hair on one’s chin can be the cause of a potential nervous breakdown.

While the pressure to get facial hair removed is recognized by many women as a stupid social norm, they strictly follow it. Because these little whiskers represent the most basic rules of the patriarchy – femininity.

But is facial hair uncommon in women? No.

Then why are they considered such a problem?

Women across the world spend a lot of money and energy in body hair removal

About one in 14 women have hirsutism, a condition where “excessive” hair appears in a male pattern on women’s bodies. But plenty more women who don’t come close to that benchmark of “excessive” still feel deeply uncomfortable about their body hair. How to measure if you have excessive body hair?

There’s a tool for it, designed of course, by men.

In 1961, an endocrinologist named Dr David Ferriman and a graduate gave birth to the Ferriman-Gallwey scale. Nine body areas (upper lip, chin, chest, upper stomach, lower stomach, upper arms, upper legs, upper back and lower back) are analysed and  total score is then added up – less than eight is considered normal, a score of eight to 15 indicates mild hirsutism and a score greater than 15 moderate or severe hirsutism.

But I didn’t even know about this scale before writing this article and I bet, neither did most of you. And we don’t wait for a scale to measure if we think we have too much hair. One look at a friend and we are often convinced that we have a ‘lot of body hair.’

On average, women with facial hair spend 104 minutes a week managing it, according to a 2006 British study. Two-thirds of the women in the study said they continually check their facial hair in mirrors and three-quarters said they continually check by touching it. (The Guardian)

This made me ask a few of my female friends. They agreed that they spend a considerable amount of time worrying about the hair on their face and body. E.g one said that she would never go out on a date if she hasn’t waxed or had her eyebrows threaded. In fact eyebrows and are still okay, but she wouldn’t go out if she had a moustache.

Yes, that’s an exaggeration about the amount of hair on her upper lips. It might not even be visible to the other person, but she would feel uncomfortable with the idea of the existence of the hair.

Hairless legs are seen as desirable

There are some medical conditions which can cause moderate or severe hirsutism, the most likely of which is polycystic ovary syndrome, or PCOS, which accounts for 72-82% of all cases. PCOS or PCOD is a hormonal disorder affecting between eight and 20% of women worldwide. There are other causes too, such as idiopathic hyperandrogenemia, a condition where women have excessive levels of male hormones like testosterone, which explains another 6-15% of cases.

Also, body hair is a race thing. In 2014, researchers looked at high-resolution photos of 2,895 women’s faces. They found that, on average, the white women had less hair than any other race and Asian women had the most. And Asians include us--Indians.

Female hair removal is a big, booming business in our country. Just take a look at the number of parlours around you and the most used services—waxing. Not just that, almost every female bathroom will have a razor, for that sudden event when you can’t wax your hair.

And I am pretty sure, your parlour wali aunty has said, “Dont’ you want hair on that part of the body removed?

“What will you do after marriage? Tab toh karwana hi parega”

I guess it doesn’t take a genius to figure out that hair-free bodies are meant to be consumed by men.

After all, who decides what's desirable?

Things might be changing a bit though. I hear women in my parlour saying how winters are happy months because no waxing. Actresses like Julia Roberts and singer Miley Cyrus have sported arm pit hair. Miley even had them dyed.

And Harnaam Kaur, who has a lot of facial hair, embraces her beauty with pride.

You too can be happy the way you are—don’t feel pressurized to remove hair, or keep it either. It’s a choice, but it’s a choice that has the stamp of patriarchy on it for sure.