So you're dissatisfied with your partner in bed. Here's how you can talk to him about it

Let your partner know that you are sexually dissatisfied, but with tact. Photo: Shutterstock/ IndiaPicture

So, you've just had an hour of steamy sex session with your partner and while he snores peacefully, you are turning and tossing in bed. Why? Because the sex wasn't good, you were nowhere close to a climax, and you have absolutely no idea how to broach the subject.

Yes, ladies--we get that. It's not easy telling your partner that he is no good in bed and leaves you unsatisfied every time you attempt lovemaking. But, this doesn't mean that you clam up and stay mum. Though, it's a touchy subject but you need to approach it with caution. If you are dreading having a conversation with your bae about sex--then just relax. We are there to help. Here are a few tips that will show you the way:

Don't Play The Blame Game

If you are trying to chalk out the right way to mention your sexual dissatisfaction to him, it's imperative that you don't blame him in the process. Don't start by saying that sex with him is no good and he just can't make you orgasm. Set a neutral ground before coming to the main problem. Ask him whether he enjoys sex with you or if he feels there's something off in the sack. Once you are aware of his thoughts, proceed to the next step, which is:

Tell Him What Makes You Happy And What Doesn't

For instance, if you think there is not enough foreplay happening and you feel it will make you happy, let him know. Make a list beforehand of all the things you enjoy doing while having sex. Once you have it ready with you--educate him. Likewise, if you need more time to hit the big O , tell him that you don' want to rush things in the sack. The point is: be specific. Don't leave it up to him to guess what turns you on or makes you climax. Also, don't forget to mention the things you find uncomfortable during sex.

Use A Lot Of 'I' Than 'You' In The Conversation

Confused? Well, if you start every sentence during the course of the conversation with 'you', you will end up making the whole thing about his inability to satisfy you. This will not only make him sink deeper into his shell, but will also shed him of confidence. And we don't what that to happen, right? So, it's best if you initiate the conversation with 'I' playing as the mainstay. For instance, instead of saying, "You don't make me orgasm," say "I have not been able to climax lately and I was thinking…"

Don't Talk About It Right After Sex

Ladies, it's imperative that you have the talk at the right moment. And right after sex is clearly not the right time. He's all flushed up with the after-sex-high and probably not in the right frame of mind to comprehend things straight. You might want to initiate the conversation at a time when he can provide you with his undivided attention and moreover, understand things more clearly.

Take His Inputs On How To Jazz Things Up

It takes two to tango and it takes two to set things straight. So, if there is something that is not working for you, then discuss it with your man and ask for his inputs. Let there be a dialogue where you discuss things and come up with ways to make things more interesting in the bedroom. *wink* *wink*

Also read: The reason why he really wants you to orgasm has nothing to do with your sexual pleasure