Being single is annoying, but hell, dealing with men is even worse

Live a man-free 20s. Photo Courtesy: YouTube

I recently suffered from food poisoning. Needless to say, it was a horrible experience that rendered my body weak, but I still feel refreshed and better.

In case you are wondering what my health status has to do with a relationship post, here's the deal: My ailment (and the countless leaves, along with the mushy Valentine's week) made me realize one very important thing, apart from being more careful about my eating habits.  

You know, when I was drooling over every bite of that scrumptious chaat-paapdi, little did I imagine that something so (seemingly) satisfying could backfire and bite me in the a** later. Much like the relationship I had.

Also read: 5 reasons why Valentine's Day and its rosy, chocolatey cousins are a waste of your time.

Blame it on my lameness or my lack of ability to handle 'free' time, but I couldn't help but draw parallels of this situation with my relationship that ended recently.
Yes, I blatantly compared my ex-boyfriend to a seemingly-satisfying chaat-paapdi.

Before you accuse me of being a man-hater, let me clarify that I am not anti men, but going by my recent stints with them, I am not exactly in favour of dating. So, give your judgmental asses some rest and find solace in calling me an anti-dating woman, for now.

As for all those who found the comparison to chaat-paapdi offensive, well there are worse symptoms of food poisoning (such as puking) that can be used as objects of comparison, but he's a lucky dude, you see.

I know I sound stone-hearted, and I am not the kind who would listen to tum hi ho on a loop after a break up. But there are aspects of a break up that affect me. 'Annoy', in fact, would be a more appropriate fit there.

I am talking about couples going all out expressing their love to their beloved and baby-ing them right in front of my eyes. No, they no longer make me go like, "OMG! I wish I had someone too." I've reached a point where it makes me go like "royenge baad mein."

So yes, if you look at the bigger picture, singlehood is a blessing in disguise.

For starters, it spares you from the horror of a clingy man trying to track every breath you take, every move you make.

No faking orgasms.

No snoring.

Also read: Is your partner micro-mistreating you? Here are the 5 hidden signs.

Having said that, I am not anti anything, but I seriously think that our 20s should be spent having a gala time rather than crying over a man.
So, if you ever have to choose between your relationship and pizzas, how many pizzas will your order?