I am a Muslim woman from Lucknow and I am shit scared of my new Chief Minister Yogi Adityanath

The brotherhood between Hindus and Muslims in Uttar Pradesh is wearing thin. Photo Courtesy: YouTube/ AltNews

The first thing I did after I woke up from a very disturbed night's slumber on 18th March was to switch on my television. No, I was not eagerly anticipating the cricket match to commence. The reason was much severe.

After BJP's victory sweep in Uttar Pradesh polls, the Chief Minister of the state of was yet to be decided. And I, a Muslim woman from Lucknow, now living in Delhi, had my fingers crossed hoping that he would not turn out to be a religious bigot.

The cut-throat competition between Yogi Adityanath, Keshav Prasad Maurya, Dinesh Sharma, and Manoj Sinha was no less exciting than an India and Pakistan cricket match. Not that I had any favourites, but I was terrified that Yogi Adityanath would somehow miraculously beat the others in the race.

And my worst fears came true, when he actually did! Saying that I was left disappointed is an understatement. I was internally seething in fury.

For the uninitiated, the man who has now been elected as the Chief Minister of UP, has often got embroiled in controversies over hate speech targeting Muslims and other minorities. And not just normal ranting--but some vile, filthy statements that can make your blood boil.

A couple of years back, in 2014 to be precise, a video of Yogi Adityanath had surfaced, where he was seen sharing the stage with a right-wing leader, who was inciting a crowd of thousands to dig up the graves of Muslim women and rape them! And before you say that the statement was not made by Adityanath and hence he can't be reprimanded for it, do note--he is clearly visible sitting on the stage next to the bigot, without batting an eyelid.

A man, who found nothing wrong with the outrageous and extremely lewd line of thought, is now the CM of my state. He holds power and that is what scares the shit out of me, and many other Muslims like me. What if he really decides to act on it? Would there be any stopping him?

I come from a family that takes pride in being secular. I have celebrated Hindu festivals and visited temples while growing up in Lucknow.

After all, the place is famous for its Ganga-Jamuni tehzeeb. A brotherhood between Hindus and Muslims in the state is a symbol of religious harmony--one that has remained intact even through the most communal of times.

But unfortunately, the ties are wearing thin, thanks to fundamentalists from both religions.

The monk, who has time and again spewed venom against minorities, women, and people from the LGBTQ community, now heads the state Government and that is scary enough.

For years, Adityanath has cashed on religious tension prevalent in some areas in Uttar Pradesh and that's why it comes as a shocker that a man, who has on several occasions urged Hindu men to convert Muslim girls and has fed fuel to non- nonsensical concepts like love jihad and ghar wapsi, was chosen as the CM elect by BJP. And that makes me wonder-what if everything I have heard so far about the part being anti-Muslim is actually true. Well, there's only on way to find out-wait and watch.

So, coming back to the 18th of March. After I saw television channels flashing the update of Adityanath becoming the new CM of UP, I instantly called home. And as soon as the line got connected, the first sentence my mother said to me was, "We are glad that you and your sister don't live in UP anymore. Pata nahi ab kya hoga."

I could sense fear in her voice and it resonated within me. Trying to make light of the matter I said to her, "Maybe it's time for you and Papa to pack your bags and leave UP for good."

I had meant it as a joke, but my heart broke at the thought of leaving a state, a house, neighbours, friends, and everything familiar just because the party in power decided to make Yogi Adityanath as the Chief Minister of UP.

So, when I decided to pen down my thoughts, I was certain that I would get trolled for my opinions, as people just can't tolerate views that are different from theirs. And so terrified I am of expressing myself, ironically in a democratic country like ours, that I no longer wish to be known by my name or faith.

Also read: The struggle of finding a house in Delhi as a single Muslim woman