7 things you can relate to if you hate playing Holi

Not all of us love Holi. Photo Courtesy: YouTube/T-Series

Have you ever faced the wrath of that over-excited kid in your colony in the form of water balloons and water streams coming out from his fluorescent pichkari guns?

Has his bura-naa-maano-Holi-hai justification upon committing the heinous act of drenching you in water reminded you of that cheating creep in your life, who explained sleeping  with another girl by saying, "bura naa maano alcohol thi"?

If you have answered yes to the above questions, congratulations! You officially belong to the Holi Hate Club. We bet, you can instantly relate to these 7 Holi-things:

Holi Reminds You of Peak-Winter Weddings

Simply because you aren't even out of your snugly sweaters yet. And there, you see people roaming around in net-thin, zero-insulation kurtas, that too completely drenched in water. Whatever happened to the mid-March chill? Wasn't wearing backless blouses at peak-winter weddings enough of a torture?

 And of Your Clubbing Scenes

Watching people act like they are high on meth with just a sip of the bhaang is a crude reminder of that attention-seeking friend at the club, who ends up calling all his exes post just a glass of 1000-times diluted vodka.

You Question Life's Principles

Bearing the chill for the sake of looking ravishing at weddings is still understandable. But what thrill do people get out of standing the cold, looking like multi-coloured goons from the planet of apes?

You also don't get how people point fingers at the neat, clean, and dry Valentine's Day when Holi is the festival that deserves to be questioned?

Holi Turns Your Camel-Mode On

The sight of coloured water going down the drains simply burns a hole in your heart and you wish you could somehow conserve every drop of it. Because you are the type of person, who doesn't even mop the floor and bathes bi-monthly, citing water wastage as the reason.

It Also Turns Your Bi**h-Mode On

Watching unrecognizable, coloured faces of some people makes you wish that they remain that way for the rest of their lives simply because their real faces are worse.

We say reverse-Gabbar because unlike the original one from Sholay, you ask the opposite, "arre o sambha, Holi kab khatam hogi, re? You also hate bullets. We mean, the bullet-like water balloons that strike you out of nowhere.  

On Second Thoughts, You'd Like To Be The Real Gabbar Too

Because you just can't resist the urge to shoot down all the mess-makers who use everything from eggs to shaving creams to cow dung to their own poop to play Holi. And how can we forget those cheapass hooligans who start misbehaving with women?